Awkward (Turtle) Questions

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 3

I have decided that I need more than 45 minutes to get ready in the morning, so I've set my alarm clock 15 minutes earlier and it's made quite the difference. I always have been stingy with sleep, so it took me a while to face reality.

I worked at my desk gluing clip art to my worksheets for a while. Students were everywhere getting ready for the school festival next Tuesday and Wednesday. I was busy, but everyone kept saying I must be bored. I don't know if that was Japanese Style Hinting ™ or if I was somehow not looking enthusiastic enough, despite the scissors and glue stick. Eventually, Mustache-sensei came and told me that I'm allowed to leave my desk and should go look around the school and see what the students are up to. This makes me, now, think that perhaps the teachers were pushing me to go do something else, something less mundane, but that technique – you look bored – is not nearly as effective (and, if anything else makes me want to work harder!) than saying – leave and have fun!

It turns out Ottawa-sensei was going on a round, too, so we fell in together. I spent a good deal of time talking to three third-year boys. Their English was decent and they had spunk, unlike many of the shy groups of girls I would later encounter. They were, however, teenage boys, and with that comes universal characteristics. They asked me if I liked purple (my blouse was fushia today) and then moved on to trying to (between hitting each other and bursts of giggles) phrase a more intense question. From what I understood, and they were pretty good – the meaning was definitely there – they were asking what characteristics I look for in a man. Not wanting to answer that if I didn't have to, I dodged. See, the student speaking was asking “what I like” and kept getting stuck on the word “mens.” So, I brightly replied that, “I like mints! Yummy candy!” They immediately made that that wasn't what they were asking, but gave up.

That is, of course, until Ottawa-sensei wandered back that way. And they asked him in Japanese and he gave them the sentence in English! Ottawa-sensei, having lived in Canada has a good English accent, speaks and understands well, and is quite close in age to me (maybe within 5 years.) We've talked a fair amount, so I didn't feel at all uncomfortable about cheerfully exclaiming to him, “You're enabling them!” The boys never actually ASKED me the question. (I did, however, by this point have an answer worked out for the boys: I like tall men, so I'll keep that on reserve for the next round of questioning, whenever that'll be.

For the record, we were warned countless times that we would get weird, very personal questions, so I'm not surprised. Also, I'm not offended because, compared to what many other JETs have reported, this was positively tame. Students tend to ask for, um... size/length numbers, or how old you were the first time you had sex (at least that's what Parker says they asked him!) so, this? Simple.

I did confirm with Ottawa-sensei that they were asking about my preferred characteristics. He tried to say that they were asking generally – in people, but I pressed, and he admitted they were mostly curious about men. As I thought. I doubt the students are familiar with the use of “men” to mean general-neutral humans. These boys, all of my boys, are going to keep me on my toes.

I chatted some with some girls as well, and explained to them how a claddagh ring works. They were delighted. I also had to explain that, even though I was wearing rings, I'm not married. Which lead to everyone's favorite question – “Do you have a boyfriend?” which, oddly, when I say I don't, has been getting me high fives from girls all day. Like... lots of high fives and I don't think I've gotten any yet since coming to Japan.

The students are preparing for the school's culture festival. First year students are making themed classrooms and TWO have the theme haunted house and one is themed Halloween Party. I was surprised – it's barely SEPTEMBER! But, when I asked, they were all surprised that Halloween is still two months way. I'll have to turn this into a lesson – there's so much enthusiasm for the topic!

When students come into the teachers room looking for a teacher or waiting for a teacher, they sometimes end up talking with me. Today, I was much more strict about being QUIET in the room if you talk with me (although I was losing patience with a group of girls who constantly broke into loud giggled and even ended up laughing on the FLOOR! I don't see quite what's funny. I get the idea this isn't the most studious of groups – one girl had seven piercings and another was wearing heavy fake eyelashes and all had dyed hair, but they were friendly. We looked through some of my papers, read my “The Amazing Pop-Up Book of Perfect Punctuation” which, yes, is amazing, and chatted between laughing fits. One girl, noting my bento on my desk, inquired after it. I confirmed that it was mine, and they were delighted. They asked what I had had and I started “rice, vegetables – ” And hadn't gotten to anything else when the girl asked, “bejitarian desu?” [vegetarian?] which surprised me. So I confirmed it and it'll probably be all over school by tomorrow. That's okay. These ladies were also kind enough to (after inquiring over my relationship status) call over to Mustache-sensei and ask him (I believe) what he thinks of me. That's when this got awkward. (Awkward Turtle) He replied that I was a nice girl and that was the end of it. They also pressed me about Mischievous-sensei, but I insisted he was much too old, something that got them positively crowing!

I believe that “too old” will become my standard excuse for these questions as I doubt this will be even close to the end of them. Yes, I could tell them off, but they're actually using English! And, I want them to come talk to me. And, it seems that, for Japanese culture, this is (perhaps?) normal. It seems something every JET experiences, so I don't want to be the mean one who alienates her students over a cultural issue. Plus, no OTHER teacher has objected or made a move to stop them, including the poor male teachers dragged into it.

I had less to do in the afternoon, so I focused on photocopying, so I'll have copies of everything for when I go to Kogyo and Nishi next week.

As I was getting ready to leave, I caught Mama and asked her about Omiyage. See, there are 50 teachers that I'm responsible for at this school and I only have 38 candy sticks (and some assorted other stuff.) So, I need to figure this out. I think I'll have to personally hand it out (and if teachers miss out – their loss!) But this will also allow me to give slightly better ones to people who have done me favors. It's all so complicated and expensive.

We also talked about my lesson plan, and Mama did a brief scan, although she'll be doing more tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow is Saturday-- she's still coming to school. And on Sunday. Teachers here work so much! I then got into a discussion with Ottawa-sensei and Mama about dialects in Japan. It seems that my questions about dialects have been pretty insufficiently answered because the Japanese place less importance on them – viewing them more as curiosities. I explained that in America, there are good dialects and there are bad dialects (often considered to be: New York and The South, when divided geographically) and people judge you for your dialect. They were surprised by this.

So, as it turns out, I ended up staying an hour late, which is fine. I ran to the grocery store this evening and the hyaku-en shop. The hyaku-en shop does have a Halloween display out, which might explain why the students think that Halloween is somewhere in September. But, if that were solely the reason, American students would have to think that Christmas was some time in August, because that's when Christmas stuff comes out.. I took some more pictures of Engrish.

And now, I am thoroughly tired. It's been a long week.